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'Prasna
Marga' states - 'If the couple loves each other, they can
enter into wedlock, even if there is no agreement in other
ways. This is very important in the matter of marriage.
One who loves a girl sincerely, from his heart should
marry her. Pure love is greater than any other virtue.
This is to say that you should marry whom you want, but
that does not mean that your compatibility should be
ignored. It does not mean that love will remove the
blemishes of poor compatibility in some of the areas. It
only means that if you think it is worth having the
relationship, even in the face of greater than average
difficulties, you should. Poor compatibility indicates
that the price of the relationship will be higher. It will
take more time, energy, work, patience, and there will be
more distress and ups and downs if your compatibility is
poor. If you find it worth paying that price, then you
should go ahead with the relationship. Look at the
compatibility in order to really see what the relationship
is, to really see if you want the relationship, and to see
if you can realistically do what is necessary. The average
person finds a relationship that fails Nadi, Bhrikuta,
Gana, Yoni or Ashtakvarga compatibility between the Moons
eventually becomes more than they can realistically
handle, so if any of these are missing, take a very good
look at your relationship.
This is also to say that even if the compatibility is
good, if one or both of you cannot love and relate
healthily then you will not be able to take advantage of a
good compatibility. If the compatibility is good and you
are still having problems you will have to take a good
hard look at yourselves. The good news is, that if the
compatibility is good, any work you do on yourself will
support and benefit the relationship. The relationship
will also be a better arena for you to learn what you need
in as healthy a manner as possible. If on the other hand,
the compatibility is not good, then even if you work on
yourself the relationship will not benefit much, or even
at all, and you will find yourself in situations with your
partner that really bring out the worst.
The important point about this method of compatibility is
that, it indicates whether the relationship will flow in
such a manner as to create mutual respect. Out of respect
grows love; out of disrespect grow hurt feelings and
frustration. When it comes to arranged marriages, this
compatibility is, therefore, obviously important. When it
comes to modern society that marries out of love, it is
equally important, because after years of mutual
disrespect many, many couples that once loved each other
divorce. Mutual respect is the key to all human
relationships, because from that grows real love. |
